Imagine you are an empty nester. It’s 8:00 at night. You are reading a book in the living room. Your partner is at a nearby table. They’ve been quiet all night. You think they are upset with you.
You remember the time when the two of you could talk about anything. You miss the closeness the two of you used to have. You miss it so damn much.
You want to tell them you are lonely and it’s killing you. You are afraid. You’re afraid if the conversation goes sideways, you’ll be even farther apart.
That would feel unbearable. How you wish the kids were home.
You can’t take the silence anymore.You have to get back on track. You engage them with small talk. Oh, they answer your questions but they seem so annoyed. They gradually start to open up. You both begin sharing how empty the house feels. Even eerie.
Then they tell you they need something from you. Something you’ve never heard. You ask them to explain it to you. When they do, you don’t think you can.
Now you’re fighting for your marriage.
This is what happens to Kate and Jake in Scene 4 in his play Botanic Garden. It’s available here for you to watch and/or read.
Some background.
Botanic Garden is a two-hander. Kate, is a widower, who is desperate to get out of a date to the Botanic Garden. To seek solace, comfort, even guidance, she turns to the one person who can help her, Jake, her deceased husband.
The story takes place both present day and flashes back to scenes from their marriage.
Kate and Jake are played by Chicago theater treasures, Carmen Roman and James Leaming. Under the direction of Olympic Dukakis, they inaugurated the roles at Chicago’s Greenhouse Theater in 2008.
They reprised the roles with director Ann Filmer in 2016 at the Citadel Theater in Lake Forest as the beginning of a three state tour. Botanic Garden has been performed at more than 30 venues. In 2017, it won best play at The New York Theater Festival.
The clip is from a filmed performance at The Citadel Theater. It is 9 minutes long. Yes, that’s a serious commitment. If you make it all the way to the end and let us know, you might be eligible for a prize.
A big, expensive prize.
Just putting it out there.
You can also watch the whole play; click here.
From the play Botanic Garden
The setting is the living room of a home that’s 60 plus years old. A savvy real estate broker would highlights it’s character and good bones and tell you it’s a perfect setting for lasting family memories.
Scene 4
It is evening. Around 8:00. JAKE is huddled over a laptop, writing. KATE approaches.
KATE
Do you mind if I sit here?
JAKE
I’m not stopping you.
KATE
I don’t want to bother you.
JAKE
You’re not.
KATE
You’re sure?
JAKE
I said you’re not--
KATE
I won’t say another word. Promise.
KATE opens a coffee table book` and seems to be, rather obviously, enjoying the pictures. She looks to JAKE.
KATE
Jake, I made some money today!
JAKE
Good.
KATE
Do you know what I’m talking about?
JAKE
Kate, I’m trying to write.
KATE
I got a check from the phone company for $125.33.
JAKE
Good.
KATE
Jake, I overpaid them ,and they sent me a check for the overpayment.
JAKE
What?
KATE
Never mind. Go back to your writing. (A beat). Jake, is something wrong?
JAKE
Just preoccupied.
KATE
With what?
JAKE
This.
KATE
It doesn’t seem like a writing preoccupation.
JAKE
That’s all it is.
KATE
You’d tell me...
JAKE
I’d tell you.
KATE
How’s it going?
JAKE
Like I said, ‘it’s going.’
KATE
There is something wrong. I can hear it in your voice.
JAKE
There’s nothing wrong.
KATE
So, it’s just the writing.
JAKE
Just the writing.
KATE
What are you working on?
JAKE
The same thing.
KATE
The thing about me.
JAKE
I told you --
KATE
‘I’m a starting point.’ I don’t understand how I can be a starting point and then somehow it ends up not being about me.
JAKE
I’ve explained --
KATE
-- That you grab a few pictures from a photo album, but you don’t use the whole album.
JAKE
That’s right.
KATE
But, they’re pictures of me.
JAKE
Kate, I’m trying to work.
KATE
Just tell me this. Are you mad at me about something?
JAKE
What if I were...
KATE
I just hate it. It throws me off. My equilibrium.
JAKE
You get very defensive.
KATE
Because I don’t like being in the doghouse.
JAKE
Kate, for the last time, I’m not mad at you.
KATE
Good, I’m in the clear.
JAKE
Happy as a lark as long as it’s not you.
KATE
Yes, of course.
JAKE
Do you see where something’s off? I could have something horrible going on but you’re happy as lark because it’s not about you.
KATE
Yes. I mean, no. It would be terrible.
JAKE
Not for you.
KATE
Never mind, you don’t get it.
A moment.
KATE (CONT’D)
Have you heard from Carrie?
JAKE
I would have told you.
KATE
Check your email. Look and see if you got an email.
JAKE
I don’t.
KATE
Check.
JAKE
I can see that I don’t.
KATE
You didn’t even look.
JAKE
Kate, I can see
KATE
Check mine.
JAKE
You check yours.
Kate checks her email.
KATE
Nothing... There’s nothing from her. How come we don’t hear --
JAKE
She’s fine.
KATE
I feel cut off.
JAKE
You have been cut off. We’ve been cut off.
KATE
I don’t like it.
JAKE
Get used to it.
KATE
It’s not easy.
JAKE
No one said it was.
KATE
You don’t care.
JAKE
That’s right, I don’t care.
KATE
You don’t.
JAKE
Kate, I’m trying to work.
KATE
Why don’t you go into your office?
JAKE
Kate, I’m asking nicely.
KATE
Is that a threat?
JAKE
How can asking nicely be construed as a threat?
KATE
(Mimicking) ‘Kate, I’m asking nicely.’
JAKE
I’m warning you.
KATE
What kind? Weather advisory? Low flying aircraft?
JAKE
All right, I’ll tell you. All night, you’ve been asking me if anything was wrong. That’s the big question. The mystery hanging in the air. You’ve asked, now I’ll tell you.
KATE
I knew it. I was right. I knew it.
JAKE
It’s not what you think.
KATE
Just say it.
JAKE
I’m trying to --
KATE
You haven’t said anything --
JAKE
Because you won’t let me.
KATE
Okay, okay.
JAKE
Without Carrie here, I feel like the air has gone out of our lives. I feel a numbing sameness. The days seem like weeks.
KATE
We need to get lives.
JAKE
I have a life.
KATE
I mean outside of here.
JAKE
I’m just surprised how I’m so affected. The house --
KATE
- - feels dead.
JAKE
Quiet.
KATE
Eerie.
JAKE
Unsettling.
KATE
Like that time in Paris. Remember when we were walking through the station -- What’s the name...
JAKE
Le Gare.
KATE
It suddenly seemed as if all the sound had been turned off.
JAKE
Like we had entered a vacuum.
KATE
The Twilight Zone. That’s what this feels like. I don’t understand why Carrie doesn’t respond? Doesn’t she care about us, anymore.
JAKE
Did you care about your parents when you went to college?
KATE
The last time I spoke to her? I said, ‘I love you.’
JAKE
Kate...
KATE
You know what she said? “I know you do.”
JAKE
Kate, there’s something else...
KATE
“I know you do.’ She can’t even say that she loves me anymore.
JAKE
She loves you.
KATE
Why can’t she say it?
JAKE
Kate, there’s something else. I need, from you...
KATE
What? What do you need?
JAKE
It’s hard to explain.
KATE
Just say it.
JAKE
Spark.
KATE
‘Spark?’
JAKE
I need ‘spark.’
KATE
You need spark?
JAKE
Yes, from you, Kate. I need spark.
KATE
What does that even mean? You need spark.
JAKE
I don’t know if I can define it. There really isn’t another word --
KATE
There must be a synonym.
JAKE
I can’t think of one. I think it’s one of those words...
KATE
One of what words?
JAKE
Words that mean what they sound like.
KATE
Do you mean ‘onomatopoeia?’
JAKE
Yes, spark is onomatopoetic.
KATE
This ‘thing’ spark, you need from me.
JAKE
I think you know what I mean.
KATE
How can I if you can’t even define it?
JAKE
When I see you, I need spark. I need to see it in you. It’s a sign of life. That you light up. That I light you up. A response.
KATE
What? Cartwheels? Do you want me swinging from a chandelier?
JAKE
Not all the time. Just occasionally.
KATE
Did you read about this somewhere?
JAKE
I just realized.... I thought... with Carrie gone, we’d...
KATE
We’d what?
JAKE
That you’d have more....
KATE
More what?
JAKE
More...
KATE
You’re not saying anything. More what?
JAKE
Spark.
KATE
Spark?
JAKE
Yes, spark.
KATE
You came up with it.
JAKE
It came to me.
KATE
Spark?
JAKE
Yes, spark.
KATE
That’s what you want from me?
JAKE
Spark.
KATE
Not all the time?
JAKE
Just occasionally.
KATE
Jesus...
JAKE
What?
KATE
What if I can’t?
JAKE
Why can’t you?
KATE
Because I haven’t been doing it. What makes you think I can just suddenly spark for you?
JAKE
You used to spark.
KATE
I did?
JAKE
When we first met.
KATE
Oh, that’s what this is about. You want me to pant when I see you.
JAKE
That’s not what --
KATE
A little 13 year-old in love.
JAKE
13 year-olds pant?
KATE
When they’re in love.
JAKE
Did you pant when you were 13?
KATE
Just tell me is that what you want?
JAKE
That’s not spark.
KATE
What is your damn spark?
JAKE
I’ve told you.
KATE
You’ve told me nothing. Just that you’re unhappy with me.
JAKE
I’m not unhappy...
KATE
Yes, you are. Just say it. You sit here all night, like the world’s biggest drip. Now you’ve got the nerve to tell me you need something that no one’s ever heard of. You want spark.
JAKE
Kate, just give it a chance.
KATE
I was actually looking forward to this time together.
JAKE
I am, too.
KATE
So, why do you have to go and ruin it?
JAKE
You’re acting as if I’m asking for the moon and the sun. All I want --
KATE
I know, ‘an occasional spark.’
JAKE
That’s all. An occasional spark...
KATE
I’m not a sparker.
JAKE
I’m not sure that’s a word, ‘sparker.’
KATE
Oh shut up.
JAKE
You know, you can see it in other couples. You can see it in their eyes. They way they respond.
KATE
You want someone else.
JAKE
I just want, I need spark.
KATE
What you want is to fall in love again.
JAKE
A response. A boost. Jesus, Kate, is this the way we want to go? The rest of our lives, so comfortable. Spark is life...
KATE
Is that what you do?
JAKE
What?
KATE
Spark for other women.
JAKE
Not consciously.
KATE
Do they spark for you? Women are giving you spark.
JAKE
I’m not sure I should be telling you this.
KATE
Telling me what?
JAKE
I think someone has...
KATE
Has what?
JAKE
Has been sparking me --Yes...
KATE
Who? Who’s been sparking you?
JAKE
I don’t know...
KATE
You don’t know?
JAKE
I don’t know if I should tell you. I just think it’s going to get you worked up.
KATE
Not telling me will get me worked up.
JAKE
It’s just that I’m not sure...
KATE
Not sure of what?
JAKE
If I’m really getting spark from this person. I’m just not 100 per cent sure...
MUSIC Kate steps away from Jake.
End of Scene
In 2008 audiences were offered buttons as they left the theater. One read “Sparker.” The other: “Not a Sparker.”
Audience members were typically divided.
One night someone took both. They explained that on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays they never spark. When it came to Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and Sundays they were big sparkers.
How about you? Sparker? Or Not a Sparker?
Botanic Garden premiered in Chicago in 2008. It featured Carmen Roman and James Leaming and was directed by Academy Award-winner Olympia Dukakis. In 2016, Botanic Garden won Best Play at the New York Theater Festival. Since 2008, it has been performed at more than 40 venues throughout the United States.
See Also:
Do You Know This Man?: An Irreverent Memoir is an ongoing exploration of the one character who eludes, confounds and mystifies. Me. Right now, it’s available for free, including being able to listen to some of my plays and dive into the best of Sportscape Magazine.
Current premium content available for free:
Listen to the original cast recordings of Persistence of Vision and Tops or Bottoms.
Watch a complete performance of Botanic Garden.
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